Relapse- daily life post 1

My first general life post. I think I need to put my thoughts down sometimes to help declutter my mind. Today I’m thinking of my relapse this week with my medication.

I got diagnosed with bi-polar about two years ago. This was after years of hell suffering with what the doctor just believed was clinical depression. But it was clearly so much more than that. Sure, I suffered with depression as I had my low episodes but the highs were fairly frequent too. I used to get really really agitated and snappy and then on other days feel like I was on top of the world. Finally (because I knew what was wrong) I pushed for an appointment with a psychiatrist and he confirmed it. I had bi polar.

I was put on mood stabilisers like I say about a year ago and it’s been nothing but a struggle since then. I’m crappy with routine and self discipline and I always forget to take them. I forgot the last week and I know it’s negligent because what always happens after I miss my pills is that I get a low episode and it’s an extreme low. This relapse was pretty horrid. Me and my long term partner fell out over dinner and I just wouldn’t shut up. I hate myself for it and I’m trying to think of ways to remind myself that I need to take the darn medication. I’ve been with my long term partner for nearly four years. I got diagnosed not long after we got together and despite all the struggles and hardships, he has stood by me and has been mostly fantastic. I know if I don’t fix it soon though I have a real chance of losing him.
I’ve set a daily reminder on my iPhone to see whether that helps at all. 10 p.m each night, just before bed.

Here is to seeing whether I can be discliplined over the next week and take them every day! 

Yas 

Xoxoxox

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2 thoughts on “Relapse- daily life post 1

  1. My daughter Avonlea wants to be a lawyer, she loves baking, and she loves all things English (I guess the official word is Anglophile) and while I don’t want to be a lawyer, I do enjoy baking, and I wanted to follow your blog! 😉 Avonlea and I have made some disasters in the kitchen, such as the Blue-Colored Meringue Incident. I wish I had pictures of it.

    I’m a huge dog lover & I have a Scottish collie named Lucy. I’m a writer by profession, as well as a lazy “bum” as you say across the pond!

    Hang in there with the medication. I’m glad you’re making a concerted effort to take it consistently by setting an iPhone reminder. I think that’s a perfect idea. Take the meds for your sake more than anything else – you don’t want another low period because those suck!! )- and you want to have a better, more stable relationship with your partner so that’s all the more reason to get a regular habit going. It sounds like you love one another very much. Bipolar ravages the best of relationships. My husband has been incredible, and many guys in his shoes would have told me, “See ya!” but he stuck around. He hasn’t been perfect – no one can be. Forgive me if I sound like Bossy Betty because I don’t mean to come across that way at all, but it’s important to do whatever you can so things don’t worsen. However, it’s hard…..it’s very, very hard. But you’re taking action and that’s what counts.

    I’m glad to come across your blog, and thanks for sharing!!!

    Your new follower,
    Dyane

    Like

    1. The blue meringue incident sounds interesting lol. I’m trying to think, I’ve had a couple of mess ups, that Blueberry cake took me three attempts (the recipe didn’t make it clear that the batter was for one tier so I kept trying to split it into three and wondering why it wouldn’t rise!).

      I hate the low periods, they really suck. But I hopefully will get them sorted. Most men I’ve found don’t stick around so I’ve found a keeper here!

      Liked by 1 person

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